My Boat People

I'm not one to make New Year's resolutions. I fail at enough things in life, I don't need to set myself up for more. But a few years ago I read a great idea about asking God to reaveal, in one word, that place in my heart that needs a little extra attention throughout the year. That place that needs a little more prayer. A little more polish. A little more work. This year, God revealed that word like a ton of bricks falling into my lap… FAITH. 

According to Easton's Bible Dictionary: 

"Faith is in general the persuasion of the mind that a certain statement is true (Phil. 1:27; 2 Thess. 2:13). Its primary idea is trust. A thing is true, and therefore worthy of trust."

God is calling me to put my faith in Him. To know that He is true and is worthy of trust. God is saying, "Krystal, trust me with your future. I know what I'm doing."

The last few weeks I've been thinking about a section in Matthew 14. Jesus has just fed the 5,000 with the 5 loaves and 2 fish. He has given the benediction and dismissed the crowds…

Jesus Walks on the Water

22 Immediately Jesus made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowd. 23 After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. Later that night, he was there alone, 24 and the boat was already a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it.

25 Shortly before dawn Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. 26 When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. “It’s a ghost,” they said, and cried out in fear.

27 But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.”

28 “Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.”

29 “Come,” he said.

Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. 30 But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”

31 Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?”

32 And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. 33 Then those who were in the boat worshiped him, saying, “Truly you are the Son of God.”

I've been a Jesus follower for a long time. And for most of my life as a disciple, I've been sitting in the safety of the boat. Holding on to the sides during the storms. Leaning on the people in the boat with me. I've never really gotten completely out of the boat. I've had moments where I've "tested the waters" so to speak. When I ventured to the Domincan Republic on a mission trip, I stuck my toes out of the boat and saw a glimpse of God's faithfulness. 

With our upcoming adventure into church planting in Oceanside, I feel like God is calling me to get completely out of the boat. He is saying, "Come." And the amazing thing is, like Peter, I want to get out. I'm ready to let go of all that is comfortable and secure. I'm ready to face the stormy seas.

The most difficult thing about getting out of the boat and faithfully trusting that God will take care of all your needs, is letting go of control. There are no more sides to hold on to. No more safety of people surrounding you. It's just me and Jesus and I have no control of the situation. He does. And when I remember to keep my eyes on Him and put my faith in Him, then I feel like I can do what He has called me to do. 

Yet there are days, just like Peter, when the stormy waves start to overwhelm me. How are we going to get out house ready to sell? What if no one wants to buy it? How are we going to get enough financial support for a family of five? How can we afford to live in Southern CA? How are we supposed to pay for health insurance? And those are the days that I start to sink and say, "Lord save me!"

I often wonder what the other disciples were thinking when Peter started getting out of the boat. I'm sure there may have been a hater or two in the group. "Peter, who do think you are?! Thinking you can walk on water like Jesus? You're just a dumb fisherman. You're not qualified to do that!" But I think that most of the guys in the boat, his best friends, the people that loved him most in the world. I think those guys were cheering him on. "Go Peter!! You got this!!! Way to go!!!"

I think of all of the "boat people" in my life. My family and friends and church community. There may be a few "haters" in the crowd. People who feel that we are not called or qualified to do this church planting thing. I've felt the sting of their words before. But mostly, I hear the cheers. "You can do this!! I'm so excited for you! We're praying for you!" And it's those words of encouragement that keep me going. Those prayers that remind me to keep my eyes focused on Jesus so He can lift my head above the waves. 

I am forever grateful for the amazing "boat people" that God has brought into my life. The people who love me most in this world. Thank you so much for lifting my spirits on the hard days. I can hear your cheers and feel your prayers. And I appreciate your continued support as we head down the crazy and exciting path of church planting. 

Faithfully His,

Krystal